Note: Speech in italics is being translated from American sign language to spoken language with no other notation.
She met Alister and Kadeem out front of the building. Entering in rank order, Alister boarded the drone first, followed by Tatiana. Instead of sitting near the door, Kadeem climbed over Tatiana and sat down practically in her lap. Annoyed, Tatiana scooted closer to the door. “Really, Kadeem?” she yanked her robe out from beneath his bottom, “What are you afraid of? Think I might grab his Holiness and kiss him?”
“Don’t try to play innocent with me,” Kadeem sniffed at her, “I know what type of virgin you are.”
“Oh really?” Tatiana twisted around, “And what type of virgin is that?”
“The type that does everything except the actual act,” sneered Kadeem.
Alister stuck his left hand in between them, bringing his right hand down on it in a chopping motion. Tatiana didn’t even have to know sign language to get his meaning. He was telling them to stop arguing. She turned her body away from Kadeem, crossing her good arm underneath her bad. The earth outside of the drone was getting smaller as the craft took flight.
“His Holiness says he caught a few words and he doesn’t condone conversations about sexuality,” Kadeem’s voice dripped with resentment. “He wants to make sure you know,” Kadeem paused.
Tatiana turned back towards Kadeem, “Know what?”
Alister looked at her, “You will die,” he slurred, flipping his hand back and forth like a fish out of water.
“Die?” Tatiana lowered her brows, “From talking about . . . um, dirty stuff?”
“You are so stupid,” Kadeem huffed, “No one dies from talking about sex. You’ll die if you have sex.”
“You’re the one who’s stupid,” Tatiana looked down. The ground was a patchwork of greens and browns. “I wish I wasn’t even on this drone.”
Alister stood up, ducking his head. He pushed Kadeem towards the far end of the drone and sat between them. He poked Tatiana, “Do you have paper and pen?” She pulled her notepad out of her robes and passed it to him. He wrote for a while, then passed her the pad back.
“The first requirement to become a priest is to be virginal,” it said, “The last requirement is that your curse be taken over to the land of the dead. You can think of it this way: you have one foot in the grave. The only thing keeping you in the land of the living is your purity. Lose that and you die. Therefore, it is a poor choice to stir up desires that cannot be fulfilled. Live your life with a pure mind and you will be content.”
Tatiana stared at the notepad, shocked. “So I can never have children?” she wrote.
“Don’t think of what you have lost, think of what you have gained,” he wrote back, “At least that’s what Mina says. I think she’s full of it. You must live a life that is mostly solitary, and that’s hard. I don’t personally feel that I’m missing out when it comes to sex and romance, but that’s just me. It’s harder to give up the idea of ever being part of a family again.”
Tatiana sat still, lost in her thoughts. She was vaguely aware of Alister and Kadeem talking back and forth, but she no longer cared what they were saying. She had always wanted to start her own family someday. As far as sex was concerned, she had been trying to wait for marriage. Now there was no someday, she was destined to die alone. “Or in the arms of a man I can't resist,” she thought rebelliously.
The drone was making good time to the border. She was vaguely disappointed by their speed. For the moment she would have to put her thoughts aside and focus on the situation in front of her.
They landed in front of a concrete building. Once the door slid open and the steps extended, Tatiana exited. Alister clunked down the stairs behind her, his eyes on the institutional looking building in front of him. He made a bee-line for the entrance, Kadeem hard on his heels. Tatiana lingered by the drone. She didn't like the look of this building, or its location. It was close to a river, the sound of water deceptively peaceful. Even if there wasn't guard towers or barbed wire, her gut told her this was a prison.
Alister looked over his shoulder and gestured at her. She nervously walked towards them, feeling like she was heading into an avalanche zone. Her internal alarm system was going crazy, sending adrenaline pumping through her veins, her mind telling her to run.
Alister tapped a button next to a biometric pad. “Help you, Holiness?” a voice crackled out of a speaker grill. A prior visitor had ground their cigarette on it, leaving the butt on the ledge formed by a seam in the concrete.
Kadeem addressed the the speaker, “I am a translator for his Holiness Alister Ellipse. He is deaf. You may address him directly and disregard my presence. He says that we would like to cross the border to Egregia.”
The intercom crackled, “Cross the border? No one wants to go to Egregia.”
“We are on a mission, sent by the Holy Circle, the eternal Ellipse,” Alister’s signs were firm, bold.
“One moment,” the speaker went dead.
Alister frowned, glaring at the front of the building. He continued to sign, his frustration obvious in the force of his language.
Curiosity peaked, Tatiana turned to Kadeem, “What's he saying?”
“He’s prophesying against them if they don't let us cross,” Kadeem watched Alister talk, with the casual attitude of someone eavesdropping.
“How do you know it's prophetic and he’s not just pissed?”
“First of all, Princess, Alister doesn't get ‘just pissed,’” Kadeem pulled his hair out of his eyes so he could glare at her, “He’s a holy man, in direct communication with the higher power.” His bangs slid back over his brown eyes, “And second of all . . .”
Tatiana watched him fuss with his hair, “You should wear a barrette.”
“That's it, I’m not talking to you anymore,” Kadeem walked away from her, heading back towards the drone.
The speaker crackled to life again, “We will need to confirm the identity of the priests and translator. Please take turns using the biometric screening device.”
Tatiana poked Alister and pointed at the biometric pad. He gave her a puzzled look, so she took his hand and placed it on the device. Even after releasing him, she could feel the residual warmth from his broad fingers in her palm. “I really need to start learning sign language,” she said to herself. Alister finished his screening and Tatiana took her turn. She winced at the prick of the needle, watching as the device turned yellow then green.
Alister signed for Kadeem to come back over. He marched over to the screening device, his head down. As the cuff wrapped around his hand, Kadeem yelped. Tatiana laughed, then glanced at Alister guiltily. Much to her relief, he was laughing too. When Kadeem finished his screening, Alister signed at him.
“He says servants have never been cursed. They are people who have chosen the holy life for themselves,” Kadeem’s face was impassive.
“I guess I should have warned you about the biometric screening,” Tatiana said apologetically.
“I should have warned him,” Alister responded, “You don't have enough experience to know what servants know and don't know. But you can safely assume that Kadeem knows nothing about Egregia.”
The speaker came back to life with a buzz, “I will be opening the door. Please enter.” There was a humming sound, and Tatiana grabbed the knob. She held the door for Alister and Kadeem, trailing them into the sallyport.
A guard sat in a plexiglass booth, a speaker grill and biometric pad mounted on the front. Another steel door was in front of them, a window showing an empty hallway with floors waxed to a high shine.
“Close the door,” the guard spoke into a microphone in his booth.
Nervously, Tatiana closed the door behind her. She could hear the lock click into place, and she hoped no one noticed her hands were shaking. They waited in the sallyport until a second guard appeared in the hallway. The door clicked open and they were escorted down the hall. The walls of the hall were blank, broken by an occasional steel door. The hallway ended in a T, and the guard led them to the right. There were large windows on the left side of the hall, affording a clear view of a green expanse of grass.
Alister stopped in front of the windows, signing his approval of the yard. The prisoners were outside, fishing in a lake and tending a small garden. Tatiana squinted at a wolfman pulling weeds. Even though she knew he was dead, part of her hoped he was Tate. Feeling her eyes on him, the wolfman looked up and winked at her. Tatiana’s face burned with mortification. Abashedly, she turned her attention to the guard, who was talking about the structure of the yard.
Alister asked about the odd haze on the sides of the yard unbounded by the building or the lake. “It’s a black hole barrier,” explained the guard, “As you approach it, it seems to move away from you and time slows down.” Like a tour guide, the guard directed their attention to the lake. It was a wholly artificial feature, water entering the compound through a massive pipe covered with steel grating. The shore to the left of the pipe was bounded by a sixty-foot wall. “Scale-proof,” the guard stated proudly. Directly across from the pipe was the dam itself, a much lower barrier that afforded a picturesque view of the woods of Egregia.
“Don’t people just escape over the dam?” Tatiana asked.
“Sure, sure,” the guard smiled, “Even if they survive the fall, into a dry creek bed, I might add; they land in Egregia and are good as dead. Nine times out of ten they’re back here begging to be let in. They like it here. The cursed need this kind of structure.”
Tatiana shivered involuntarily. There was a type of evil that was so institutionalized, so sanitized, that it couldn’t even be perceived. “Unless,” she thought, “Unless you are the one it is structured against, and you are the blot it is trying to wipe out.”
The others were already continuing down the hall, and Tatiana had to hurry to catch up to them. At the end was another door. The guard used a biometric pad to open it. He waved them inside, then shut the door behind them. Finding herself in another sallyport, Tatiana jittered.
“You claustrophobic?” Kadeem asked.
“No,” Tatiana continued to shiver, “Carcerophobic. Jails creep me out.” There was a buzz as the door in front of them opened. They exited the sallyport into Egregia. “Why have a door that goes to Egregia in a prison?” Tatiana looked back at the door. There was no handle on the Egregian side.
“It's not a prison,” Alister responded, “It’s a work camp for the cursed who have technological skills. If someone can't work for some reason, they transfer them to Egregia.”
“So this is the place,” Tatiana looked for the creek, but saw nothing, “but how would someone sneak into that place?”
“Sneak in?” Alister gave her an odd look.
“I would go in through the service entrance,” Kadeem contributed, “All these places have one. Just find a vendor that comes regularly. Then you either get hired by them or you hide yourself in their delivery.” He stopped suddenly, a blush spreading across his face, “Not that I would ever do anything like that.”
“Uh-huh,” Tatiana shot him a knowing look.
In the distance she could hear the tromp of horse hooves. As the wagon drew nearer, she waved in recognition. It was Carl driving the horses. He pulled up in front of them, his face sober.
Alister signed to him, and much to Tatiana’s surprise, Carl signed back. She nudged Kadeem with her elbow, “What’re they saying?”
“It looks like this Devil was Alister’s brother.”
“What?” Tatiana spoke louder than she intended, then lowered her voice, “Carl is Alister’s brother?”
“He’s not the Devil you assaulted, is he?”
“No, Carl’s a good guy,” Tatiana was watching his face. He looked like he was going to cry. “He’s good with the horses, gentle, quiet,” she sucked in her lip thoughtfully.
Alister scampered up the side of the wagon and gave Carl a hug. The two men embraced for a moment, before they both turned their attention to Tatiana and Kadeem, Alister signing and Carl yelling, “Get in!”
As she approached the wagon, Carl rolled out a metal ladder. “Smithy heard you were coming back,” he pointed to the ladder, “She made you a gift of sorts.”
“I’ll have to thank her,” Tatiana scaled the ladder with ease, “This really helps.”
Kadeem climbed up after her, his eyes wide, “Why horses? Doesn't it take forever to get from place to place?”
“I was born here, so it doesn't seem weird to me,” Carl rolled up the ladder, “but our mom wasn't.” Carl flicked the horses’ reigns, “She used to tell me about things like cars and drones. Sometimes I’d try to explain it to Alister, but I didn't really know how to sign it.”
“Your mom didn't sign, did she?” Kadeem’s brow furled.
“A little. More than my dad, but not as much as me. Kids pick up things like that a lot faster.”
Kadeem frowned, “You probably don't even have a deaf community here.”
“Oh, we do,” Carl didn't seem to sense the barb in Kadeem’s words, “That’s how Alister and I learned to sign. We had a deaf nanny.”
“Did she default on a loan?” Tatiana couldn't help herself.
“Yeah, something like your situation,” Carl looked at her, “Sorry you got caught up in that. We really loved our Nan though. And she was allowed to go back home once we were grown.”
“And that makes it okay,” Tatiana couldn't hide her bitterness.
“No, it doesn't make it okay,” Carl gazed out at the road ahead of him, “but love makes things a little bit better than they are without it.”
Tatiana felt something land on her face. She brushed it away with her fingers, her hand coming away wet. “What if you were never loved?” she thought to herself, “What if you just tripped over someone else's love story? What if everything is rejection and hurt?”
“His Holiness wants to know if there's something we can do for you,” Kadeem looked vaguely annoyed.
Tatiana shook her head.
“It’s hard for me too,” Alister looked out the front of the wagon at the dirt road ahead, “so many of my memories are here, in Egregia, and many of them are painful.”
“Mina said something about you not wanting to name your patron,” Tatiana rubbed her eyes.
“Yes, I had a hard time accepting what happened.”
“Me too. I still don't really believe it.”
“My mother is my patron. When she killed herself I was very angry with her. I was sure this was proof that she hated all of us,” Alister’s eyes were bright with pain, “To hear someone say she killed herself for my sake was horrific.”
Alister’s story made hers feel insignificant in comparison.
“Aren't you going to share, Bi-er, Tatiana?” Carl glanced at her.
Feeling foolish, Tatiana shook her head.
“Okay, I’ll tell it then,” Carl turned to Alister and started signing. Tatiana pulled her notepad out and tried to write. Feeling stuck, she tapped her pen against the page.
“I hate you,” Kadeem spoke suddenly.
“Aw, what brought this on?” Tatiana side-hugged Kadeem.
“You don't deserve to know,” Kadeem squirmed out of her grasp.
“My brother said he will protect you and never betray you,” Carl chimed in, “He was really touched by your story.”
“What exactly did you tell him?”
“Just what I know,” Carl shrugged, “That your friends tied you up and traded you for another woman. That you fought them. That one of your friends died.”
“I don't need to be protected,” Tatiana stretched, then sat cross-legged.
“I don't think he means physically,” Carl smiled diplomatically.
Tatiana glanced at Alister. He was talking to Kadeem, hopefully oblivious to the fact they were talking about him. She flipped to a new page on her notepad and started writing.
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